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  1. #1

    Thumbsup Patayin ang sumpa part 2

    Street Vendor : 'bili na kayo ng relo! gold watch ito!
    pag namuti, white gold!
    pag huminto stopwatch!'



    gf : hu hu hu hu bakit natin ginawa ito? hindi na ako
    virgin at dalawang beses pa natin ginawa!
    bf : ano? isa lang ah?!
    gf : bakit, hindi na ba natin uulitin mamaya?!



    Couple talking:

    wife : hon, paki fix naman ilaw sa labas.
    husband : hello!? electrician ba ako
    wife : eh di pkigawa na lang hagdan natin.
    husband : hello!? karpintero ba ako?
    umalis c husband, pagbalik gawa na lahat ng sira sa
    bahay. tinanong niya wife kung sino gumawa ng trabaho.
    wife : kasi kanina a man saw me crying, sabi ko dami
    sira dito sa bahay. so he offered to help in exhange of either s*x or
    bake ako ng cake.
    husband : so pinag-bake mo siya ng cake?
    wife : hello?! baker ba ako?!



    ANG MARRIED LIFE....

    May isang intsik na sa sobrang hilig sa karaoke ay inabot ng 5 am.
    Dahil sa takot mabugbog ni misis, nag-text ng:
    'HUWAG KA BAYAD RANSOM. NAKATAKAS AKO. UWI NA KO!'



    Husband: 'Paratina lang tayo away! Maghiwalay na lang tayo!'
    Wife: 'Sige, maghati tayo ng mga anak!'
    Husband: 'Akin ang mga guwapo at maganda!'
    Wife: 'Sus! Pinili pa yung hindi kanya!'



    Sa harap ng nursery window;

    Friend: Pare, pag laki ng anak mo, am sure magaling mag-drive
    Dad: Bakit, pare, malaki ba ang kamay?
    Friend: Hindi. Kasi kamukha siya ng driver ninyo!



    Husband came home from church, suddenly lifted his wife and carried her.
    Wife: Why? Did the Pastor tell you to be romantic like this?
    Husband: No! He told me to carry my cross!



    Friend: 'Wow, pare, ganda ng sapatos mo, ah!'
    Husband: 'Oo. Surprise gift ng kumare mo!'
    Friend: 'Surprise? Ano occassion?'
    Husband: 'Wala. Nakita ko na lang sa ilalim ng kama namin kagabi!'



    Health Advisory: 'Beer contains female hormones, and can
    turn men into women.
    After 5 pints.... men become talkative, unreasonable,
    irritable, cry for nothing, and urinate while sitting!'



    WIFE: I'm warning you! Parating na husband ko in 1 hour!
    HANDSOME VISITOR: Wala naman akong ginawang masama ah?
    WIFE: kaya nga! kung may balak ka, GAWIN MONA!!!



    WIFE: Himala! aga mong umuwi ngayon.
    HUSBAND: Sunod ko lang utos ng boss ko. Sabi nya 'GO TO
    HELL', kaya ito uwi agad ako..



    Wife: Lab, may taning na ang buhay ko. Huling gabi ko na
    to, let's make love.
    Husband: Heh! tumigil ka nga. Maaga pa akong gigising
    bukas, buti ikaw, hindi na. HEHEHHE!



    Population policies of countries:
    China : Stop at 1 child.
    Singapore : Stop at 2 children
    Phil: STOP AT 4 A.M.!



    RUSSIAN: we're 1st in space
    USA : we're 1st in the moon
    ERAP: we'll be the 1st in the sun
    USA : you can't go there, you'll burn
    ERAP: we're not stupid, we'll go there at NIGHT!



    Ano kadalasan ang sinasabi kapag nautot?
    American: Excuse me.
    British: Pardon me.
    Pinoy: NOT ME!



    Last edited by qtmeztiza; 25th Feb 2008 at 22:03.

  2. #2

    Default Re: Patayin ang sumpa part 2

    jejejejej tamang-tama lang ang trip jejejejej

  3. #3

    Default Re: Patayin ang sumpa part 2

    hehe

  4. #4

    Default Re: Patayin ang sumpa part 2

    Old skul but still stings

  5. #5

    Default Re: Patayin ang sumpa part 2

    Nice post

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